like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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