This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
We got so high we made milksteak
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?