So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
