We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize
