Texts From Last Night

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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Whiskey dick.

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.

  (417): View more from Missouri

  Everyday of my life.

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  (417): Whiskey dick. (810): Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it. (417): Everyday of my life. http://tfl.nu/axyq
  Replies (3) Good night (729) Bad night (921)
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  (916): View more from California

  Just got yelled at by a priest...again.

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  (916): Just got yelled at by a priest...again. http://tfl.nu/n99j
  Replies (5) Good night (1272) Bad night (542) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?

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  (781): does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant? http://tfl.nu/3cg3
  Replies (56) Good night (4076) Bad night (1003) Order T-Shirt
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.

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  (231): Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life. http://tfl.nu/gt3a
  Replies (25) Good night (3898) Bad night (732) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.

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  (206): Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun. http://tfl.nu/3gwj
  Replies (39) Good night (11622) Bad night (718) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war

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  (916): rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war http://tfl.nu/t68o
  Replies (32) Good night (881) Bad night (6488) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker

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  (714): turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker http://tfl.nu/o91j
  Replies (14) Good night (9222) Bad night (1276) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.

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  (856): It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk. http://tfl.nu/u52z
  Replies (19) Good night (3698) Bad night (1465) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me

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  (+44): Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me http://tfl.nu/dbfn
  Replies (9) Good night (960) Bad night (4078) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job

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  (610): When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job http://tfl.nu/gbra
  Replies (4) Good night (3054) Bad night (1034) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  Oh God.

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  (919): DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT??? (1-919): Oh God. http://tfl.nu/z02g
  Replies (20) Good night (4456) Bad night (511) Order T-Shirt
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.

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  (386): Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am. http://tfl.nu/mad5
  Replies (7) Good night (1449) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left

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  (330): I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left http://tfl.nu/2seq
  Replies (16) Good night (760) Bad night (2313) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.

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  (206): I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship. http://tfl.nu/s5mh
  Replies (17) Good night (2115) Bad night (773) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.

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  (479): Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine. http://tfl.nu/rrcc
  Replies (3) Good night (1720) Bad night (480) Order T-Shirt

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