Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
