just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize