Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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