I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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