her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
