There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Pants are for mortals
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
