watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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