she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize