At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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