he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
