Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
