Got a toothbrush?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize
