My nipple is on Facebook.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
