Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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