I understand Curling. That high.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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