p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize