i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
