his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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