Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
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