She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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