Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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