And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize