Umm I'm too high to move.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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