Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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