Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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