i would punch a child for taco bell
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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