I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
