I want to stick my p in your. b.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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