Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
