Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
