I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Randomize
