hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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