What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
