she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
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I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
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Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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