the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
