he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
