The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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