the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
