i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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