Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
