What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
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So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
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Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today