I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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