i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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