bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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