Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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