Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize
